Update

By the way, all is well now.  I think we have a better understanding but we still think we need God's help and we are going to get it.  All I wanted was for us to work out a way to talk with each other.  It was very nice talking to Dr. Sittnick, he used to be a marriage counsellor back when he was in the military as Commander in Chief (I think).  He told me that a lot of men (including himself) 1) try to carry the weight of their marriage on themselves, he told me a lot of men wants respect and should always remind myself to make sure I don't slip and then he told me that there are 3 mistakes men make- 2) he says they make the mistake of thinking for women (and they are always wrong and I laughed because my Jude does it all the time).  And I have to think about the third one.  He told me but there are two exercises that he used for the other married couples that he will pass on to me- he says what is it that Jude does that makes you feel loved? and what is it that you do that make Jude feel loved (Jude has to answer that)? and he said then you too must sit together and try to sort out what is possible or impossible.  My husband turned in a resignation letter and that is how all of these sprung up.  Unfortunately, from talking to him it sounded like it wasn't what he wanted but he thinks it is what the family needs.  Except he decided that on his own, with a bottle of wine as he told me, and a weak reason not to from an unmarried friend.  We talked at large and he agreed to think about it and although he is yet to give me a final answer- I think he is going to keep his job.  That is one of the things I am trying to get used to - when I hear I will think about it to me it is not a final answer and I always feel that the discussion was never complete.  Anywho...we have been ok thus far.  There is a patron saint for everything my the way...  Love~ Cheech